Monday, August 12, 2013

If I Had It To Do Over

If, for you, tomorrow never comes will the people who care about know how much you love them? 

Todays lifestyles are so frantic that all the wonderful moments that should be savored are blurred out. But although we are often unable to enjoy them through force of habit, do not doubt that they're there. We can't change the things whizzing past us and all around us, but we can stop ourselves from being sucked into the gray void. Press the pause button, focus on the present, moment by moment. 


Think for a moment about your daily life. How does your day start and how does it end?   I'm at the computer with a mug of coffee when my husband leaves for work. He kisses my cheek and I say a quick "bye"  and he's out the door. I haven't truly been aware of his presence in the room with me.  My mind is racing through my day.

I scan the headlines for the days latest happenings. Then on to the e-mails that have multiplied overnight. Then I glance out the window and see him climbing into the car and I realize there's something missing. And what's missing is me -- my attention, my presence, my here-and-now connection with the person I'm spending my life with.  Then I think to myself "I have so many important things I have to do today.  I'll pay more attention to him tomorrow morning"

Stock Photo: Woman working at home with laptop computer

It's the fallout of modern life: hurrying, multitasking and, ironically, making connections so constantly that we don't realize how disconnected we've become.  The next time you go out to eat watch how many people are text-messaging during their dinner dates. What are they doing? Setting up the next dinner date? Is there a perfect future dinner date that it's all leading up to, therefore this one is not important? I don't think so.

Texting...

"We need to slow down and pay attention to what we're experiencing, while we're experiencing it. However frantic or distracted you may feel, remind yourself that this is it, there are no "do overs". You're playing a game with your kids; you're eating breakfast with your husband; you're walking home through the summer twilight; you're washing dishes at the sink. Your life is really only a series of these very moments, and to hurry through them on autopilot means you're in danger of missing the whole thing.

If you're zipping along through life -- its daily tasks and troubles -- to get to the next thing, ask yourself what that next thing is. Tomorrow's daily tasks and troubles? Next year's? Death? Your life is happening right now. It's sorting the laundry, looking for your keys, getting the kids to school. You need to really be there for the day-to-day activities.  Quit waiting for the good times to come and seize the moment -- this one.  You're not guaranteed a tomorrow but you have the present.
how to handle photoshoots with a newborn AND an older kid/s.  Favorite suggestion:  ask the older child what they think they should be doing in the picture.  (One kid said he should be playing his guitar for his sibling.)  I also really like this pose with the pregnant Mom and the older sibling.

Engage fully in what you're doing while you're doing it -- regardless of what it is. Multitasking doesn't make anything go faster, but it can make things more confusing. I try to remember this when my mind is racing while I'm putting my children to bed. Making mental to-do lists while reading Winnie the Pooh means I'm not doing either with my full attention. The to-do lists will wait but this moment of sleepy won't and I can never get this moment back.
Mom reading books to child    Cute kids - baby asleep reading Winnie the Pooh

In our world of instant messaging and microwave society that can't wait 60 seconds, it can be hard to remember to focus on the journey as well as the destination. It's hard to be present at the dinner table if your IM alert is calling you. Make rules for yourself about cell phone or BlackBerry use and stick with them, whether it's not texting people during your kid's soccer game or not taking calls during your family's weekly movie night.  When you are with the ones you love, actually Be with them. When life is over, they will be the part of your life that truly mattered.
Find Family Time with These Simple Tips

It's hard to remain focused on the moment when you feel like you've got to just race through the difficult stuff, but the difficult stuff is an invitation to be present. The next time you find yourself stuck in traffic or a huge line at the grocery store behind the person with 21 items, breathe deeply and smile. Your heart is beating and you're alive -- gifts that are easy to take for granted when things aren't going the way you need them to. If you're always wanting what you don't have, always wishing for more or different or anywhere but here, it's time to reevaluate. Easier said than done, sure.  Get back to what matters: the people you love, meaningful relationships, a grateful attitude.  Get back to what truly matters if "tomorrow never comes".

Will they know how much you love them?


Angel

(exerts from article by Catherine Newman that I felt truly needed to be shared)
(photos from Pinterest)


46 comments:

  1. Such a good reminder! We never know what tomorrow will bring. We all need to hear this every so often. I know I need to be better about being in the present.

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    1. Hi Michelle
      We truly never know what's coming next. We miss so much by rushing through moments we can't get back. We are all busy but I don't want to get to the end be filled with regret that I missed so much. Sometimes we just have to hit the pause button.
      Thank you for visiting with me today.
      Angel

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  2. Good Morning Angel, This was such a thought provoking post. You are so right, we have to live in the moment, before that moment has gone. A few years ago my husband suffered a major heart attack, it was a normal day, he was at work, I was arranging some Easter decorations when I received the call that he was in hospital. I drove on auto pilot to get to the hospital, I was alone because I lived in Cyprus at the time. To see the person you truly love lying in hospital surrounded by all the paraphernalia which kept him alive and knowing that there was nothing I could do to help him was the most dreadful moment of my life.
    My lovely husband survived, which I am truly grateful for, but now, I make sure I live in the moment. I don't wish I had this, or I had that, I am grateful for what I have, my lovely family and my wonderful husband.
    Best Wishes to you,
    Daphne

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    1. Hi Daphene
      I'm very glad to know your husband survived the heart attack. My husband had a similar experience a few years back and it was terrifying and very eye opening. You learn how quickly you can loose the ones you love. I realized that I want to enjoy my time with him and with my kids. I'm so glad you came to visit. I'm your newest Twitter follower and loved your night time photo post.
      Angel

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  3. Thanks a lot for your thoughts. Excellent views.

    I wrote some time ago, "You control the mobile phone, the modern technology does not control your life. You created, you are the master. Your creation does not govern your life."

    Children grow up too fast. It looks like it was yesterday when we were changing diapers and today... we are at the college graduation.

    Let our grown up adult kids to have the memories from happy infant years.

    Family is a treasure to take care of.

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    1. Hi Ana
      Thanks you for visiting my blog. Memories last a life time, your cell phone will last until your free replacement contract expires. We all have to choose where we spend our time. Your blog is wonderful and I'm your newest follower via Twitter and Pinterest. So glad to get to know you and your blog.
      Angel

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  4. great post.old follower
    Hope you can visit my Inspire me Monday

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    1. Hi Michie
      I love that train track. Thanks for visiting with me.
      Angel

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  5. Hola Angel!
    Amazing post full of wisdom! Thanks for reminding us of what's really important in our lives!

    Thanks for linking up!

    ~SimplyyMayra of
    PonderWonders

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    1. Thanks Mayra
      Great to see you. Thanks for visiting.
      Angel

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  6. What a lovely reminder of what truly is important ~ thanks for sharing at this week's Project Inspire{d} ~ pinning.

    Hugs,
    Mary Beth

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  7. I truly believe that my closest family know just how much I love them. Thank you!

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  8. I agree with a lot in this share, so many people are constantly on their phones all the time. I rarely ever even use mine.

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  9. I find myself not "present" occasionally. My boyfriend will call me on it. I am trying harder and I think I am doing better lately. This is a good reminder.

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  10. This is such a wonderful reminder, thanks.

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  11. I can get very distracted by things and sometimes I have a hard time focusing on people. It just feels like most women are so busy all the time! This is a wake up call to not to ignore the people you love. Thanks!

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  12. In this crazy times everyone is thinking of 20 things at once. I make sure that I tell my children (Grown), and my granddaughter I love them every day.

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  13. I don't own a cell phone so it is easy for me to look around and see people are so consumed with them. It takes away from so much. But who am I to judge. I am addicted to my computer. :) Thanks for sharing this nice post.

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  14. In the morning, after the kiddo is off to school, I pour my cup of coffee and go outside with the dog to breathe in fresh air, enjoy seeing the trees and grass and birds and just BE! I do this no matter the weather so I might be bundling up or in rain coat and boots!

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  15. Such a lovely reminder! Thanks for the post!

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  16. My husband and I go out to dinner every Friday night. We often comment about the couples sitting at the table on their phones and not paying attention to one another. Drives me crazy! We just celebrated our 42nd Wedding Anniversary in December....our phones are not used when we are out. We each know we are very loved!

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  17. Thanks a lot for your thoughts. Excellent views.

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  18. UI think it would be good to start over and do it again. I thank you for the nice post.

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  19. Great reminders. It really made me think. Thank you.

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  20. Great reminders. It really made me think. Thank you.

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  21. My fiancé and I are working through a book called thirty days to love. this is actually a question they ask you to consider, and to really treat each relationship as if that might be the last time you are with that person

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  22. I tell my grown sons, my grandchildren, etc I love them each day. I always get a kiss and hug. Life is short and we never know when God will decide to take us home. I try to show those I love how special they are every day of my life. Thank you for sharing this article. I enjoyed it alot

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  23. So true! More of us needs reminding of this.

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  24. This is a great post. Thank you for sharing this wonderful message.

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  25. thanks for sharing this post==if i had to do things over, i woud hope for better outcome

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  26. Great message thanks for sharing this.

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  27. A really good post and a reminder for all.

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  28. I so completely agree. I think this was a big factor in my marriage ending. A good reminder to live in the moment before it's gone.

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  29. I lost my fiance passed away in our home several years ago. The last thing I said to him was goodnight & I love you. The loss was deveasting. Slowly I have learned to handle the grief. I will never move past it because it has become a part of me. But now I have a beautiful little boy. I make sure everday that he knows how much I love him.

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  30. I have had a serious health issue as has a sister and my parents. I have a young niece (4 yrs old) who has had 10 heart surgeries. Life is precious.

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  31. Thanks for reminding us.Sometimes we need to live for the moment.

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  32. Thanks for reminding us.Sometimes we need to live for the moment.

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  33. You have so much wisdom! This remind me of the song "If tomorrow never comes" by Garth Brooks.

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  34. We need to enjoy every moment of every day we live. We need to stop and take time out to enjoy our family. We need to help those in need whenever we can. God often reminds me of what is really important in this life on earth. It is not striving to make millions or making our sure our house is clean and sterile. Thank you so much for this great article. I really enjoyed it.

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  35. You hit the nail right on the head. We really do have to slow down and pay attention to those we love. It's difficult sometimes to take the time. But it's well worth it. Thanks for the reminder.

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  36. What a lovely post. Cell phones in particular drive me nuts. I don't allow them at meals or when we are having date night. As I get older, I realize how much more important it is to really spend time with one another and life itself.
    Hug to you,
    Bev

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  37. We need to MAKE TIME for others. I'm certainly working on it, life is very busy.

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  38. This really makes you stop and think.

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  39. You are so right about this. Sometimes we get so caught up in our own disabilities, hurts, and woes and trying to get ahead that we forget the ones we are unknowingly trampling over throughout our day. - - I am making a decision to always allow interruptions in my day because God is putting them there for a purpose, to remind you and me that love always comes first.

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